'Society' expects 18 months of mourning before embarking on a new relationship

 

  • Brits believe people should wait 18 months after the loss of a partner before they start dating again  
  • After divorce, society expects people to wait 10 months before coupling up with a new partner
  • The difficulties of moving on – after divorce, it takes over a year for couples to become financially independent

 

Widows and widowers are expected to mourn for 18 months before starting a new relationship reveals new research1 from Direct Line Life Insurance, and over a million Brits think people should never date again if their partner has died. 

Following a divorce, ‘society’ expects people to wait on average 10 months before dating someone new, or eight months following a marriage separation.  People looking to find a new partner following the end of a past relationship feel judged by these unwritten rules of dating. 

People are more forgiving of those entering into a new relationship following the dissolution of a civil partnership, where they are expected wait just seven months before looking to date again. 

Introducing children to a new partner can be emotionally fraught following the death of a parent or breakdown of a marriage.   The prevailing view is that children of the bereaved should only be introduced to their parent’s new partner after 15 months of dating.  Divorcees are expected to wait 11 months after they start a new relationship before introducing their children to their new partner.     

Situation How long on average someone should wait before dating someone new How long someone should wait before they should introduce their new partner to their children after dating someone new How long someone should wait before introducing their new partner to their friends after dating someone new
Following the death of a wife or husband 18 months  15 months  15 months
Following the death of a partner (when the couple are not married) 17 months 15 months  15 months
Following divorce 10 months  11 months  10 months 
Following marriage seperation (i.e. married but living apart) 8 months 10 months  8 months 
After the dissolution of a civil partnership 7 months  9 months  7 months 
Following the end of a long relationship (more than a year) 6 months  8 months  6 months 
Following the end of a short relationship (less than a year)  3 months  5 months  3 months 

The bereaved are expected to wait 15 months after starting a new relationship before introducing their new partner to their friends, while divorcees should wait 10 months.  Sadly, there can be animosity between friends and family when people are perceived to have moved on too quickly from a previous relationship.  One in six (18 per cent) people have fallen out with someone as a result of starting a new relationship too quickly following a divorce or death of a marital partner and 15 per cent after the dissolution of a civil partnership.        

 

Jane Morgan, Business Manager at Direct Line Life Insurance, commented: “Modern society can be highly judgmental, which can lead to undue stress and emotional pressures.  It is up to the individual to decide when they feel it’s right to move on from a previous relationship and how best to navigate introducing a new partner to their friends and family. Charities such as Relate have valuable guidance on how to navigate this process with children to help them while they adjust.”

 

Financial difficulties of moving on 

Coming out of a relationship it can be extremely difficult for couples when separating their finances, such as debt and mortgage payments.  Following a divorce it takes on average15 months for a couple to finally manage their money independently and exit from joint financial liabilities.  The research found some people are locked into joint liabilities and can’t escape at all following the breakdown of a relationship, with one in twenty (five per cent) divorcees still financially tied to their ex.

 

Morgan continued

“Moving on from a past relationship is often a time when people review the protections they have in place for loved ones.  Taking out a life insurance policy could help to financially support the important people in your life should the worst happen.”     

 

For more information on life insurance, please visit: https://www.directline.com/life-cover/family-financial-planning 

 

     - ENDS -

 

Notes to Editors

1. Research conducted by Opinium among a nationally representative sample of 2,003 adults between 8th – 11th January 2019

 

For further information please contact:

Simon Henrick

Head of News

Direct Line Group 

Tel: 01651 831 668

Email: [email protected]

 

Katie Ormrod

Citigate Dewe Rogerson

Tel: +44 (0) 20 7025 6440

Email: [email protected] 

 

Direct Line

Started in 1985, Direct Line became the first UK insurance company to use the telephone as its main channel of communication. It provides motor, home, travel, pet and life insurance cover direct to customers by phone or on-line. 

Direct Line life insurance policies are underwritten by Legal & General, registered office: One Coleman Street, London EC2R 5AA. Legal & General Assurance Society Limited is authorised by the Prudential Regulation Authority and regulated by the Financial Conduct Authority and the Prudential Regulation Authority under number 117659. You can check the FCA register at www.fca.org.uk/register or call the FCA on 0800 111 6768. Legal & General will introduce customers who select the Funeral Benefit Option to Dignity Funeral Services, who are members of the National Association of Funeral Directors.

Customers can find out more about Direct Line products or get a quote by calling 0800 145 5522 or visiting www.directline.com/life-cover